Comments on: Shades of Sexuality

By: rakesh

rakesh — Wed, 01 Jul 2009 03:54:24 +0000

Sankalp,i feel that homosexuals are doing the same thing that they have been opposing.That is not respecting individual choice.I feel that if any person is attracted to people of both the sexes in a sexual way and enjoys the same,we should respect his/her feelings and let him/her enjoy in both the ways.I certainly feel that they must be leading a better and richer life,sexually.

By: sankalp

sankalp — Sat, 27 Jun 2009 18:11:07 +0000

Firstly, engaging in sexual activities during adolescence shud not be seen as bisexuality or bisexual behaviour. as has been stated in the article and the comments, bi-curiosity during teenage can have a variety of causes and any discussion about the same wud generate as many opinions as the number of people discussing the issue.
i think bisexuality wud be engaging in sexual activities with individuals from both the sexes for a prolonged period and well after then end of adolescence. and as far as the genuineness of bisexuals is concerned, then i think that if a person engages and most importantly enjoys sexual activities with people from both sexes then he or she is a genuine bisexual and there cant be two opinions on that.
if u r a non-bisexual and have passed ur bi-curious teenage years, then the idea of having sex with a member of the sex which u dont prefer wud be abhorrent to u. now if a person like u engages and enjoys in sexual activities with a person from the non-preferred sex over a long period of time, then he/she has to be a bisexual.
now as to why certain homosexuals dont believe that bisexuality is not genuine is because at some point of their lives, they must have considered the option of coming out of the closet and declaring that they are bisexuals and not homosexuals as according to the general but massively flawed unspoken consensus, bisexuality is ‘better’ than homosexuality because in the former u r atleast attracted to the persons of the opposite sex. coming out of the closet in such a manner has another advantage: one can engage in homosexual behaviour and yet be a part of the heterosexual group. thus homosexuals believe that people who claim they are bisexuals are faking it to not face as much chagrin as a gay. and they are aggressively convinced of this argument because they think that the bisexual concerned does not have enuf audacity unlike him/her to come out completely of the closet and also in this manner the concerned bisexual person doesnt contribute as much towards the LGBT movement (which sadly in recent times is talked of as a gay movement) as they think they do.

By: Ripper

Ripper — Tue, 02 Jun 2009 12:32:52 +0000

If 70% of the population live in rural area, and some social trend is seen over there, why do we equate it with basic human psychology like sexuality. We can view it from two perspectives. Either analyse it from a demographic point of view or from an entirely basic human psychological point of view. This article has done a wonderful job of analysing and putting forward the later point of view. Thus we can’t generalise something as basic human nature if its seen in 70% of indian population as in that case there will be many other social factors like economic independence, culture, moral values etc into play.

By: Aghori Girl/Ghar Jamai

Aghori Girl/Ghar Jamai — Fri, 29 May 2009 15:41:33 +0000

Rural India is very large (most of the population lives in a rural setting). I have been to many rural areas and I ask; where and when is the oppurtunity for young unmarried women to have lovers?

I’ve not seen it. The women are with the women, the men with the men, in general.

Can people sneak around? I’m sure some do. But really, I don’t think its as open a society as you are claiming.

By: Nutsure

Nutsure — Thu, 28 May 2009 14:54:05 +0000

Different shades of sexuality depends in which phase the mind of an individual is trapped. The child developement has four phases of sexuality. There is an oral phase, anal phase, phallic phase and the latency phase. Almost every individual passes through these phases in lesser or a greater degree. Issue becomes more complex when the sexuality is fixed. Bisexualty if treated as infidelity, either in straight or a gay/lesbian marriages should clear the air surrounding the mindset. Infidelity again has different shades in various stratas of society. In that case there may be a demand to legalize infidelity !!

By: rakesh

rakesh — Thu, 28 May 2009 08:26:04 +0000

I found the article not very enlightening and the reactions are equilly confusing.May be the subject is such that everyone reacts on the basis of perceptions and not personal experiences.I know a few friends of mine who experimented in college with other guys and slowly waned away.Why gays hate bisexuals,acc to me is they already are living on edge and might think that the people who are enjoying family life are experimenting with gays for just having fun and that they cant offer any commitements in relationship.

By: Trip.thong

Trip.thong — Wed, 27 May 2009 15:42:37 +0000

I don’t think gay men find the idea of ‘genuine’ bisexuality reprehensible, and by genuine I mean those relationship which are not a facade to conform to hetero-normative behaviour.
Cheating on a wife while one sleeps around with all the men, that’s abhorring.

However, I do strongly object to the word ‘choice’ which people loosely throw in any discussion on sexuality. People do not choose to be gay, bi or straight. It’s the way people are. On aghori girl’s comment, I’d like to say that repression and sex segregation is something that is a perception in urban india. Rural india ( around 70% of population) is sexually quiet liberated and sexual experimentation takes place between opposite sex more than same sex there. So blaming gay behavior to repression will not be the best explanation.

Some people are gay. period.

By: Aghori Girl/Ghar Jamai

Aghori Girl/Ghar Jamai — Tue, 26 May 2009 16:22:25 +0000

D10, I personally don’t know any homosexuals who are anti-bisexuality. Maybe this is just an “Indian thing”?

But sexuality plays out differently in different cultures and in India, homo erotic behaviour is very much a result of repression and sex segregation. Same sex boarding schools also have that reputation.

By: D10

D10 — Tue, 26 May 2009 09:16:28 +0000

Interesting article! It was rather surprising to learn that homosexuals may not be so comfortable with the idea of bisexuality. I have always been of the opinion that acceptance of homosexuality means acceptance of the idea of choice and inclination. Why then, do homosexuals themselves find bisexuality reprehensible?? It is also rather sad to read some of the reactions to your blog which root bisexuality (like homosexuality!) in some kind of repression. Why people fail to understand the idea of choice is beyond me!

By: Kamal Asnani

Kamal Asnani — Tue, 26 May 2009 04:51:04 +0000

I have to agree with Aghori Girl/Ghar Jamai.

The sexes seperation at all levels is just too much in India. Males testosterone levels peak at 18-25 and they do anything for a bone loosener. In fact the desperation and sexual immaturity in Indian males persists i feel even later when they do get married also. So at various ages both sexes, males more than females resort to all sorts of sexual releases, bi, homo, incest, etc etc

In the western world where dating etc is allowed these problems seldom arise. Whne they do its due to boredom and experimaentation.