The Outrageous Republic
The election process is nearing its end
And the EC’s rules meet their bends
There’s much at stake in the Indian poll
Decency goes to bed in the hullabol!
The breathing saint of the famous headstand
Abandons elegance as he takes the grandstand,
Mocks the bachelor prince for his political ways
– And lands himself on difficult days
So, what’s wrong with visiting a Dalit home
though it’s not as cool as anulom and vilom
Why bring into this a honeymoon angle?
And contort your body in an election tangle?
From headstand highs to foot in the mouth
The reputation of the holy man goes unholy south
Oh what fun this tragic campaign is!
There’s so much bite and so much hiss!
Yonder in Kashmir, the Lion’s son roars
(Though he often tells us stuff that bores)
Says Lotus-stampers must jump into the sea,
Wins brownie points in the troubled valley.
Nearby in UP, the long-nosed princess
Practises her own linguistic excess
Says her rivals are panic-stricken rats
While her comrades hang upside down like bats
“There’s blood in his hands,” says an eastern cry
A quizmaster’s elegance has suddenly gone dry
There’s much bad lingo everywhere like mud
Landing all over like Saddam’s scuds!
And then comes gossip on elderly leaders
Who, we discover, are relentless breeders
What’s an election sans a scandal with sex
with ticklish pictures and romantic texts?
Beyond all stands the leader who would be king
He aims the smartphone like it was a fancy bling
Clicks a Selfie, with hand that holds a Lotus
The rivals cry foul: “Narcissus Interruptus!”