The under-cover gaze



The Issue: Beauty and the burqa

The Soundtrack: Bette Davis Eyes

There are only two things in the world that make not-so-pretty women appear pretty: beer and burqas.

While it’s true that I don’t drink solely for the aesthetic purpose mentioned above, my relationship with the burqa – usually associated with backwardness in Muslim society and the strange guilt that accompanies the fear that makes women stay literally under-cover in public – is of a one-tracked kind. Let me explain. Each time I pass a lady in a burqa, the only thing I can imagine under the Darth Vaderess cloak is an incredibly stunning woman shielding her beauty from the world’s eyes lest the onlooker goes mad with desire and love.

Without her burqa on, how are we to look at that without bursting into flames?

Without her burqa on, how are we to look at that without bursting into flames?

Statistically, I’m told, the number of pretty women under burqas are liable to be the same as those liable to be plain. (Interestingly, these statistician friends of mine insist that the number of pretty women – with or without a burqa — in the world roughly number the same as the non-pretty ones. This is total bakwaas considering I know from my anthropoligist friends that by definition, ‘beauty’ and ‘ugliness’ — unlike plainness — has to be a ‘minority characteristic’. If every second woman in a place looked like Angelina Jolie, the Angelina Jolie look would hardly be special and, therefore, deemed ‘hot’.)

Well, coming back to the burqa, the point I’m trying to make is that for me it gives any woman a mysterious erotic air, in which she’s hiding something sensuous in a teasing fashion rather than protecting her ‘modesty’ (a strange term that). So when French President Nicholas Sarkozy, wants no women in France to wear burqas (a sign of “debasement of women”), I say he’s worried about what goes through his head when he sees a burqa-clad woman.

Considering that I’ve viewed Mrs Sarkozy’s pictures with her kit off (that never included a burqa) I can understand even more why in true Gallic-style homegrown supremacy of erotic tastes must be held high above all other forms.

The first thing I notice about burqa-clad ladies – and probably the last thing too – is the eyes that peer out of the gauzed front. That being the only window to what lies within, the pair of eyes automatically are invested with incredible, seductive powers – no matter if the contours of the burqa suggest a Shehnaz Huseein underneath it. Which is why Kim Carnes’ 1981 blinder of a song, Betty Davis Eyes, came rushing back to me as I heard about the Sarkozy plan to get all women in France out of their burqas – no matter what they might be wearing underneath.

Although I’ve never heard the original version of Bette Davis Eyes that was written in 1974 and then rejected by Carnes because she didn’t like the arrangement, I can understand why the dame herself, Bette Davis, so liked the song, when Carnes did agree to record it with a new arrangement. It tilts towards what lies under, beneath, sideways, over, above – rather than talking about feminine beauty out there for the picking/checking out:

“Her hair is Harlow gold,
Her lips sweet surprise
Her hands are never cold
She’s got Bette Davis eyes
She’ll turn her music on
You won’t have to think twice
She’s pure as New York snow
She got Bette Davis eyes”

Sure, Carnes in her sandpaper-against-your-chin voice purrs on about her hair, her lips, her hands, her ‘character’ even. But my ‘gaze’ in the song is firmly fixed on those ‘Bette Davis eyes that she has. Hell, she sounds like one of the Arab ladies under those tents. Not to lead gents like me on, of course but, as Carnes tells us seductively in her grrr-ful voice, to:

“…tease you

She’ll unease you
All the better just to please you
She’s precocious
And she knows just what it
Takes to make a pro blush
She got Greta Garbo stand-off sighs,
She’s got Bette Davis eyes”

For crying out loud, why on earth the French would want to destroy such a setting by banning burqas, je ne comprend pas!

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  • Abu Ahmed

    Its good business both for the rich and the poor – from small eateries to 5 star hotels, from airliners to small taxi cabs, from luxury items to cheap curios, everything sells around the venue. Not to speak of the satta bazaris, who would be at the vanguard of it all!

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  • Brijkalia

    Yes but when will India provide proper sanitation the it’s citizens and visitors

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  • Guest

    these half-black negrito indians are forever dying to live the white european dream. they should be more concerned about poverty, pollution, population etc.

    hopefully, these foreign guests, are ‘blind’ to the mega slum sub-continent.

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  • Sushant Kumar

    I am really delighted not to find any news on cricket in sports pages in decades. Isn’t it amazing?
    Sushant Kumar
    Sydney

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  • Bala

    Supersonic means one that exceeds the speed of sound.Cars are not supersonic.Fighter jets are super sonic.

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    Sumant Reply:

    Technically you are right. I used it as a metaphor for want of a better word.

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  • SINGHAL2727

    REALLY IT IS GREAT EXPERIANCE

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  • Samcyril

    So how’s it important? its a fierce spectacle and will showcase best technology. But i still don’t get it, how is it important for India or Indians at large?

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  • Ash

    it also shows a different India – Confident

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  • Fatima Hossain

    all you can do is criticize! india is no saint either.!

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  • Gyan

    PM should not have met Zardari, as this wasn’t his political visit. It was just a pilgrim tour. India is a emotional fool, expecting lot of things from a loser.

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  • Gt12563

    We know Mr.Zaradari has no real power and he is living on the mercy of so called strong army man Kayani.He lives always in fear that coup can happen any time and just collecting corrupt money more and more.After becoming President Mr.10% rate has gone up.He did nothing good for his people and they are fed from his adminstration and want change.But for India there is no hope to resolve any of issue with this PPP president.My guess is his days seems to be over.

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  • Abu Ahmed

    Some in Pakistan like the LeT and many others are beasts; like our very own Sangh Parivar goupies viz the Bajrang Dal, Ram Sene etc etc.. We cannot kill those beasts, for that would mean killing millions. So the next best thing to do is try to tame them. Now this taming of the beast business is a very long drawn, time consuming and patience-testing one. One has to weild the stick as well as dangle the carrot before them. This is how the US is dealing with Pakistan – culling as well as carassing the target population. One cannot boycott or remain ignorant of a next door neighbour – whatever happens over there impacts us too like earthquakes, floods or cyclones as well as bouts of violence and incidence of extreme poverty and ill-health. Therefore PM Singh is handling the neighbours with the right amount of carassing – we always do the culling when required while calling ourselves peaceful (thats our Chankayaneeti – when our atomic-bomb tests are successful we encode it by declaring the incidence as Buddha smiled – how deadly can be this Buddha’s smile is not hidden from any body). So trade, culture and sports are the tools of taming that we have to use – and when push comes to shove then the Pakistanis have learnt it the hard way many a times that we can beat the shit out of them. Deal with Pakistan from a position of power and strength and yet in a tolerant manner – for that is the way to tame the beast.

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