Hindustan Times
A-CHHOOOO
Some time in the 1300s, Robert the Bruce claimed the throne of Scotland and fought the English for it. He lost a battle, became an outlaw and almost gave up his claim to the throne, when something happened that impelled him to continue the fight.
He saw a spider trying unsuccessfully to spin its web. It failed and failed and failed, but it persisted and persisted and persisted, and eventually it succeeded. The web was spun.
The moral of the story, Robert the Bruce realised, was that you should never give up. I.e., if at first you don’t succeed, try, try again.
So he tried again and won.
But I am not interested in Robert the Bruce.
I am interested in the spider, that persistent (and possibly unbearably hairy) creature (shudder) that never gave up. That spider became a byword for doggedness and diligence. At school, whenever someone (usually me) said she couldn’t, just could not get the hang of a new maths formula, or stated with the greatest conviction that she would never, ever understand anything in the physics textbook, this was what her teachers said to her (usually me): Remember Robert the Bruce’s spider?
I HATE Robert the Bruce’s spider, that nasty little creature. So I’m glad to announce that the bleeping creature can finally be replaced as the patron saint of persistence. I have found another creature that doesn’t only match the spider in its resolution. It outdoes it at least a gazillion times over.
It’s the cold virus. Specifically the cold virus I have been (a very ungracious) hostess to for the last three weeks. Persistent? Ha! This virus rewrites any definition of persistence any dictionary can come up with.
It’s been chased around my system by pills and potions. It’s still there.
It’s been zapped daily with the most acid mix of lime juice and warm water I can take without throwing up. It’s still there.
It’s been sauna-ed with eucalyptus-scented steam, subjected to quantities of vitamin C, sneezed out, sniffed in, squished hard along the sinuses, you name it. And three weeks later, it’s STILL there. So my head feels as though it’s filled with a lump of tissues as soggy as the ones permanently at my nose. I can’t think of headlines, edit copy, write stories, contribute anything remotely intelligent at ideas meetings. And you know the worst thing? Even though I live in Bombay where property is at a premium, I can’t even charge this bleeping virus rent.
Robert the Bruce’s spider. HA! Robert the Bruce’s spider is an abject, disgraceful failure that doesn’t know the MEANING of the word persistence.
(5 votes, average: 3.8 out of 5)
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Ha ha! Yeh the cold takes the cake while the spider watches in dismay
Hope u get well soon! But I must say if a cold can generate such an interesting post what would a clear mind do!
Best wishes for a speedy recovery!
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Kushal Reply:
September 21st, 2009 at 9:39 pm
Thanks Sana.
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More persistent than the virus is the unwanted and unwelcome advice you keep getting. Try, ayurveda, unani, homeopathy, allopathy, naturopathy, sympathy, empathy…. By the way you can do with a scarf around your ears, nose, throat, neck..
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Kushal Reply:
September 21st, 2009 at 9:39 pm
I tried Tibetan medicine once, Nutsure. Aged 17. I remained cold-free - SERIOUSLY - till I was 37. Had no idea that foul medicine came with an expiry date.
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Bunny, I hope you get rid of that cold soon.
I’m very prone to allergic colds (get it from my Mom), and I know the hell you go through when you get a really bad one!
Get well soon!
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Kushal Reply:
September 21st, 2009 at 9:38 pm
Thanks Pranav.
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there isnt a cure for common cold yet right?
http://mywriterkeeda.wordpress.com
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Kushal Reply:
September 21st, 2009 at 9:37 pm
Nope, Alec. I think we humans have the wrong idea about our place in the world. It’s not us who are the most intelligent beings on the planet. It’s viruses.
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Deb Reply:
September 30th, 2009 at 5:43 pm
Yup. After all, they were the ones who got the better of the aliens in War of the Worlds.
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I completely empathize with you.
I often get afflicted with this lousy disease (infection?) and am never able to get well within the stipulated five day course.
And I really, really hate the disbelieving, amused, condescending look people give me when I say that I can’t think because I have a cold.
I hope you get well soon.
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Kushal Reply:
September 21st, 2009 at 9:35 pm
Thanks PC. Hope you’re virus-free still.
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“It’s been sauna-ed with eucalyptus-scented steam”…so this was what was happening in Kerala. Interesting.
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Kushal Reply:
September 21st, 2009 at 9:34 pm
Not nice being pickled while sneezing, Akhilesh. Believe me.
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See, see? This is why all folks from Cal should never take their monkey caps off.
grins aplenty guaranteed evertime me comes here
thank you for appreciating my project (in the previous post’s comments)
[and for not making English, August jokes].
Wish I were better at teaching though! And you guys are journalists. The media is a BIG BIG help man. The only reason anyone here even hears about stuff like NREGA and RTI is because they get news channels on cable. Not that you need my certificate in any way
Also, thanks HT for featuring Momina Ghauri of Morena district (MP), who has been invited to dine with the President. ['Prez invite for super woman', Sep 18] She is admired in my village too.
And did I mention? I loved the story on Ethiopia from last month. It was in Brunch.
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Kushal Reply:
September 21st, 2009 at 9:34 pm
As a non-Bong from Cal, Abhiroop, I NEVER had a monkey cap.
And thanks for making me feel good about my job. I was beginning to work up quite a dislike of the media.
The Ethiopia story was brilliant. Wish I could lasso that man and make him write more and more.
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I have just one word for all the kind people here: ACHHOO.
And you don’t know how hard I strained my brain to come up with that one.
Signed,
The Host with the Most (Viruses)
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Bunny, give them books a rest and heed this:
http://www.nytimes.com/2009/09/22/health/22real.html?_r=1&em
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